Hurry up and wait…

Yes, I know, no news.

To my eternal shame, I failed the Schneider fitness test, on the very last exercise. I did all the waving 30lbs over your head and hoisting baskets full of weights all over the place, but couldn’t quite push 80lbs with a stupid bar attached to a couple of ropes. Apparently the ability to push a mere 78lbs makes one a dodgy trucker. There was much grumpy licking of wounds and ranting about the unfairness of things in general, and a major sulk. Especially since I had kitted myself out with a natty new flashlight thingumybob that sits on the brim of a baseball cap…all ready for those midnight vehicle checks. So, the applications still flow out, a couple of nibbles from companies who ‘might be hiring soon’ but nothing in the long-haul line just yet.

In the meantime, it’s back to Lifeline, the standby that always seems to be pleased to have me back. And plenty of driving, even if it is back to the four-wheeler. Yesterday, a 300km round trip up into Grey-Bruce country, just to change a faulty handset on a brand spanking new Lifeline cordless telephone. This new piece of kit has been causing us all some angst recently, it’s a fabulous addition to the range of equipment we install for people along with their ‘I’ve fallen and I can’t get up’ button. It’s got everything we’ve been asking Lifeline to invent for ages, and it hasn’t got all the things we hated about the previous incarnation. It’s just falling down a bit on the old quality control front, which means a lot of rushing about with replacement handsets.

The drive was sublime, through Mennonite farming country past all manner of horses and buggies, past all those ‘Quilts, Ducks, Plants, Honey, No Sunday Sales’ signs that remind me where I live. Unmarked roads, unmade roads, gravel tracks and a tiny Tim Horton’s in the middle of nowhere. I felt obliged to stop for a bagel and a small cafe mocha, it’s the Canadian thing to do.

The house, when I found it, was tucked away in an overgrown garden full of trees. I was greeted by a friendly dog and a lady who thanked me very prettily for making it all the way out there. This seemed very nice of her considering I was there to replace a brand new piece of equipment. We had a chat about this and that and generally made friends. I drove home happily round the farms and fields, looking forward to the time of year when bunches of flowers appear at the farm gates, complete with honesty boxes for you to pay what you like. I like it when there are sunflowers, but don’t usually stop for gladdies.

Arriving home a little tired, I checked my messages before keeling over in front of the telly. Gadzooks! A lost button in Kitchener! About turn, back out of the door in superhero guise to make sure that another subscriber is safe before bedtime. Sometimes I love this job. Sometimes I hate it. The trucking applications will continue.

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